Frog Church

Frog Church was founded by Green Bean, formerly of Bag, Cup, or Handful and the Christian Vegetables, following his return from the Bakken oil fields. Green Bean read about Mikey Growler's success with Look at This Frog in Entertainment Weekly and caught a frog in the West Fork of the Stones River that also had something growing out of its back. However, his venture, called Look at This Other Frog, was not a success, largely on account of his appearance repelling people, for he continues to wear the remains of his Green Bean outfit from his time with the Christian Vegetables, and having been brutally beaten with golf clubs in the Dakotas, his flesh is rather fused with the rags of the outfit. As a consequence, he was attacked on his first outing and lost the frog. The beatings, combined with him having been struck by a tire on Interstate 24, have left him slow but also prone to flashbacks. He is also on some kind of register that prevents him from being near children. At last report, he has given up on Look at This Other Frog and has established his own Church of the Frog in the swamps along the Stones River, where he preaches to local amphibians (no humans allowed). He has begun to sell Frog Church Coffee, though this reportedly consists of a coffee-like liquid served up in an old Starbucks cup. Green Bean's became something of a folk hero following 2016's Baby Biscuit Day competition, an event enshrined in the celebration of Frog Day.